hand yyyyyyy

Regarding a journal on DA

The last time I was genuinely sad was when my dog died. I remember that regardless of all bad things that happened in my life, she would still be there, sitting on my lap and trying to cheer me up, protecting me from my mother and forbidding people from waking me up during weekends. I don't think that much people love their pets like I loved mine, so when she died it was a reminder of how I really hate pain. The first time I felt pain like this was when my father died four years ago, then my cat, and then my dog. Of course I can't say that loosing a pet is as bad as loosing your father, it isn't, but hurt can't be measured and when you are sad and your heart is in pieces you don't really think, you just do the things your emotions tell you to. When I came back home from the vet, right after standing there and watching her die, and a sweet friend's house, I remember strolling the corridor shouting her name, thick tears running down my face. I must have done it for a long time because suddenly it was night and my mother was telling me to shut up. For the nest weeks I would try to pet her, but she wasn't there; I would call her, but she wouldn't come. I loved my dog, and every day that I don't see her is a reminder of how dead people won't come back, that they ceased to exist, almost completely. My father, my favourite person in this world...he won't come back, neither will the cat or the dog, I'm left here missing forever, waiting for a better future that I know nothing of.

BJD!

I always wanted a ball jointed doll, but they're expensive...very, very expensive. So, today I found a Spanish bjd website with the most adorable male doll ever. He's a scarecrow, cute as hell, and the price with everything included (clothing, wig, makeup, everything) is 279 euros. About half of what I was expecting. I want to buy him so bad, I mean argh!!!! I need to buy a computer, but I need to save a lot more money for it. What I agreed was: I'll ask money for Christmas, if until then the doll is still available (presuming I'll have enough money for it) I'll buy it.
Some people buy books, other but guitars, or cd's, or even clothing. Some buy advanced technology and other buy games. I buy a little bit of everything, but maybe, just maybe, I can fulfil my dream of having a bjd.
'Why?' you ask, well here goes nothing:

When I was little, dolls fascinated me. Even now, the human form fascinates me. It's in the science of it, and the art of it, all the parts that make the human body work and appear as functional as it is. And all the flaws, they make it perfect. Breakable, fragile, a beautiful fragility. I remember sewing dresses for my dolls and complaining how their faces were always so unreal, how they didn't move enough, with rigid arms and legs that didn't move. I liked taking photos of them when I was on vacation, but then I would never like the pictures. They were false, they looked ugly and all but natural. I was charmed when I found out about bjd's.
They were realistic, fragile and beautiful, I could sew all the clothing I wanted for them, take photos of them and draw them. And ever since then, I've wanted to buy one. So many years of wanting and I just might be able to fulfil that dream. If only the doll doesn't get sold out. I really want to buy it. It's been a while since I've ever wanted wanted something so much.

well then, bye (:

Halloween!

Have a nice Halloween!

School

Me at school, I'm the thing with the black hair and an oversized sweater. Photos taken from facebook, our class has it's own group, pretty neat hã?

Those Big Ears

Title: Those Big Ears
Rating: PG 15
Pairing(s): Nameless original male character/nameless original male character
Warnings/Spoilers: It's somewhat of a romantic short story between a man and a half human creature of the male gender.
Summary: Well, it's really short so just read it kay? This work had already been posted here, I read it again, made some changes and decided to repost it.
Disclaimer: MINE, EVERYTHING IS MINE.
This is a work of fiction made during a creative writing exercise, last year.
 

Early Morning, Glorious Morning

Title: Early Morning, Glorious Morning
Rating: PG 15
Pairing(s): Arthur/Merlin
Warnings/Spoilers: Something short, unrevised, I also have no idea what ponctuation and grammar rules are.
Summary: An early morning surprise, caused by no less than Merlin.
Disclaimer: Merlin isn't mine; it belongs to BBC and Shine.
Originally posted here, by me of course.

amazon.co.uk wishlist (October 2011)

Mah wishlist, mah wishlist!

Eleventh Doctor Screwdriver
Are you my Mummy?
The Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess Wii
The Flash T-shirt
Batman Hoodie
Wonder Woman T-shirt

Heelo, how are you, does anyone even read this crap?

A hug is nothing

I was standing there; the intense aroma of failure inebriating my senses, the desperation for touch making my head feel silly. All I wanted was to hug him.
Put my arms around him, feel the scent of the person I care for, feel the heat of skin covered by fabric, the shock of an action no one is really ready for. It’s all so impossible. It’s all so full of despair when that someone does not belong to you.
I felt a little stupid, imagining something that would never be real, and in that moment I thought, I should wear a warning on my neck ‘If you’re the one person I’ve always been waiting to meet, don’t talk to me, don’t look at me, don’t mention me, I’ll fall in love in a flash.’
And yet, all I want is to hug you.

Emptiness

I feel empty, I feel like something's missing; much like Amy Pond did on her wedding day. I know there's something I'm forgetting, something I should be doing but I don't know what it is. I think, and I think and regardless of the fact that thinking is taking me nowhere, it's the only way I know how. But then I feel, I let that emptiness have full granted access to my heart, and it doesn't take long to understand just what exactly is missing. There's a sense of accomplishment that isn't there, there's an undeniable desire to end it all, and end it good, a lack of appreciation for all things given, a lack of love or empathy, existence of sorrow or pain for things I never really felt connected to. There's the lack of a solid personality that won't wobble with my complicated feelings, a solid ground for me to step on. There's something missing, and I still don't know what it is.

Favourite OP and ED

These are some of my favourite openings and endings, some for the animation, idea or even music; others simply because I love the show, and openings always cause that tingly feeling when I re-watch them.

I absolutely love Fullmetal Alchemist, I watched it really young and while re-watching it slightly older, I read the manga at the same time. Lack of similarities between in manga story and anime were kind of a put off, then Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood came along. It was heaven on earth. 

One of the best animes ever made, one of the best, funny, well told stories ever. The music by the amazing Nujabes complements a beautiful, graphic opening that combines styles and rhythms.

I don't think a lot of people know about Ookiku Furikabutte, perhaps because it's a sports anime; but let me tell you, it's so much more than that. The animation has a quality that is non existent in some recent shows, actually, it has happened more than once that if the animation puts me off, I simply can't watch it.

In Tiger & Bunny, not only do I love the show, but the opening left a very nice feeling when I watched it for the first time. It's a superhero anime, awesomeness ensured. The opening it self presents to us the main characters, the superheros, with a clean animation and mixed styles.

Cowboy Bepop, one of the best animes ever made with one of the coolest openings ever. It's such a classic it doesn't even require explanation, it's so cool that the fact that's it's here just made the whole post cool as well.

It's funny how people can love something, but forget it just as easily. Durarara!! was epic famous while it was ongoing and even for some time after. Now, it seems to have been laid in the shadows, but not for me. The rhythm, music and clever composition of the opening reveals just how great of an anime this is, wonderful, intelligent. I'll truthfully never forget it.

Can you say most amazing, awesome, freakingtastic, amusing opening ever?! It is! I love Baccano with all my existence, and the opening is here to prove just how unforgettable this anime really is.

Definitely one of my favourite openings so far. In a completely different style from what we're used to, very graphic, and with a song that complements it perfectly. Regardless of the fact that I find the end of this story a little disturbing, the whole experience is indeed priceless and amazing.

I really like slice of life stories, that is, well told slice of life stories. Regardless of the fact that some people seemed to start disliking Kuragehime along the way, I found it positively lovely and upbeat. The opening is one of the most epic experiences I had, and yay for references all over!

(more to be added, probably)

He come to town!

After listening to this masterpiece, I drew this:
(Also, have I ever told you that Zelda is my favourite game? All of them.)

Churchill got a haircut

Churchill is home!

This is actually my grandmother's house, but he's really home home right now, with much less fur actually!

Characters for something (:

Tom Rush: The main character of our silly detective's story. He's a funny and carefree 27 year old detective that can't do much without a sidekick...that's you! He believes that vodka is the best beverage in the whole world, he despises romance novels but adores a good horror story. Most people consider him to be overly childish and irresponsible but he simply shrugs the thought away and says 'Life's no good without fun'. Tom seems to attract all kinds of people and that seems to work in his favour most of the time..however sometimes it ends up in a big, gigantic poop. He's the kind of person you would find in a cool jazz bar listening to good music, drinking some vodka and talking with the barman.

Patrick Sills: Tom's male sidekick, and mostly his conscience as well. Patrick is a 19 year old that believes milk is the best of beverages...yes, cow milk (later to find that he's actually lactose intolerant and must change to soy milk). He loves to listen some good old jazz so he and Tom often meet each other at Gilbert's bar. Patrick has a secret passion for soft romantic dramas that end up with some nice tears and one of the lover's dead, he sometimes makes references to his favourite books while solving crimes. Needless to say, his favourite type of crime is passionate and full of jealousy and drama, he loves drama. Patrick never admitted, but he's quite childish himself, being young and lacking experience in pretty much every single subject in life.

Lavanda Kate: Tom's female sidekick who hates her name...so never call her Lavanda, always refer to her as Kate. She's a 24 year old policewoman that decided to tag along with Tom to see some exciting crime happening. She knows Patrick as well, they often meet at the library, but he never seems to remember her.   Her favourite beverage is water, being clean and healthy. She's more mature than any other character and has a secret crush for Patrick. Music wise, she hates jazz; she despises jazz, the only good sound for her is classical music. You'd easily find her in some shady book store near her house. 

Gilbert (?): Nobody knows Gilbert's last name, it's a mystery. He owns the best Jazz Club in London, it's a nice place with a good vibe and good costumers. His best friend is Tom Rush and usually offers the last a few drinks on the house. He's openly homosexual and sometimes gets in trouble because of it, not all people are as open to that as himself. You rarely see him out of his club as it takes most of his time, he's a barman there too, working full time. He's a nice guy, mysterious and cool, the kind of guy you'd like to be friends with.

Friends (:

I'm the one in the middle, Catarina is the one on the left, and Pedro on the right.
I love my best friends, such a shame we weren't all together this day! But we had lots of fun anyway!
A day well spent, with three people crammed together in a tiny photo booth.

Gumball

Me and one of my best friends had a really hyper day yesterday. During classes, we had our first technologies lesson, for the next five weeks we will be working with textiles…and OH MY GLOB the damn classroom was aaaaaawesome! Plus the teachers were really cool. After school, we went down town, finnaly went to Muji and even goofed around inside a tram.
When we passed raininmymouth’s house, we decided to serenade him (us being both girls). We ended up not doing it, but simply talking to him and having a good time. I wonder what the people on the street thought we were doing :D
Then, we went shopping (something both of us hate!) and I got a new pair of pants, my now only pair of pants. Then we had pasta for dinner, went to my grandparent’s home and suddenly the day was over.
Oh and probably the whole reason why I started this post, we dared each other to cosplay an Adventure Time character (we both love the show)…and I got GUMBALL! PRINCE FREAKING GUMBALL! How the hell am I….oh well, it’ll be fun ( I guess) :D

I dreamed

Today, I took a nap and had a wonderful (perhaps a little sad) dream. In that dream, I was crossing the street and got caught up in an accident, hit by a car and hurt pretty badly. But then, in between all the fuzzy voices and people, and the pain in my arm (which I lightly remembered when I woke up) there was a ginger, freckled boy. He was a paramedic, and quite a bad one too. Nervous and shaky, unsure. And I remember asking only one thing, ‘Is my right arm alright? Is my hand still there?’ and in a soft voice he said ‘it’s all fine, everything will be fine’. I believed it, and as I woke up, I missed that boy already.
I don’t know, sometimes I have these weeeird dreams :)

Mooore drawings (Homestuck this time!)